Wicked: An Elphaba kind of prayer

Have you ever felt like the wicked witch of the west? That may seem like an odd question. Especially since most of the time we would like to think we are more like Galinda the good witch, or even the heartless tin man or cowardly lion. Maybe even the heroic Dorothy who saves all of Oz from the terrifying witch.

Maybe this will help clear up my question a bit. The other night I was sitting in my bed reflecting on all the confusing and entangling events going on in my life and it felt like I was searching for something, anything to say to God and figure out how to figure out this mess. It felt like I was grasping at straws. Seeking answers to nagging questions. Looking for peace in the turmoil. Pacing the lion’s cage hoping to find the magical thing that would set me free or fill the hollow emptiness inside.

Being the musical theatre buff that I am, this goose chase my mind was taking me on brought to mind the scene in Wicked when Elphaba is chanting frantically across the expanse of the stage trying something, anything, to make sure Fiyero can’t be harmed. If you don’t know the story, it’s a creative retelling of the Wizard of Oz that takes a look at the witch’s side of the story. It follows the life of Elphaba, the wicked witch of the west, and her friendship with Galinda the good witch and Fiyero, a new boy in school, Elphaba’s sister, Nessarose, and a munchkin boy named Boq. I don’t want to spoil the storyline for those who haven’t seen it, but it comes to a point towards the end of the story where Fiyero ends up running off to help Elphaba and he gets taken prisoner because of it. Desperate to save the one good thing in her life, Elphaba opens her book of enchantments and starts saying whatever she can hoping it will be enough to save him.

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My life has felt a bit like that, and as I mentioned, that scene came to mind the other night as I wrestled with so many of the questions on my mind. I don’t know if you have ever had moments like that, where much like Elphaba in the song, you feel like shouting at top of your lungs, trying to figure what you want to say to God or what you want Him to do. You just keep going round and round not knowing if you are supposed to listen to what He has to say or if you are supposed to spill everything on your heart. You just know that things aren’t right in your life and you have to do whatever it takes to make them right.

Sometimes, you do have so much on your mind, you don’t know what or how to pray. But, that’s ok. You don’t have to have all the right words or have all the right things to pray. God knows what our hearts are trying to say. Even when it seems like our prayers are coming out in gibberish and make no sense to us. If we are praying in earnest to our God, He will hear us. He hears us in our tears. He hears us in our laughter. He hears us when we are so full of sorrow we can’t even speak. Just make sure you do pray, and that you keep on praying. Pour out your heart to your Father and let His never-ending love enfold you.

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The story of Wicked comes to a bittersweet end. Elphaba does ultimately save Fiyero and herself, even though it may not have happened the way she expected it too. But God works like that sometimes. We will ask for one thing and He will give it to us, just not how we expected it to happen. Or, He will give us something else that’s better for us. He knows our lives better than we do and knows what we need. So, when you’re overwhelmed or feel you are just mumbling nonsense, rest in the fact that God has already written your story and knows what the outcome will be.

 

 

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Broken Angel

Her wings are torn and tattered. Her heart is battered and scarred. It’s hard for her to feel the love and joy that once flooded her heart. Her soul is worn and weary from fighting this war that seems like it will never end. Her nerves are raw and are breaking. Her mind is filled with confusion. Her body is battered and bruised.

This once beautiful angel is falling into depths of despair. Her will to carry on has been crushed beyond repair. There is so much pain in her heart. Silent pain that has taken root and has grown deep into her veins. A pain so deep it seems no one else can see the brokenness inside.

Her heart has been shattered so many times she can no longer put together the pieces to make it whole. The enemy is working overtime to fill her world with darkness and doubt. Filling her mind with everything that is going wrong in her life and smothering every glimmer of light that comes her way.

Everyone keeps telling her that this suffering will come to an end, that her battle is the Lord’s and He’ll carry her through to the end. She wants to believe He will take all her sorrow and pain and turn it into joy and dancing, but it’s hard to believe when she feels so battered and scarred.

God,  lift up this angel and carry her close to your heart. Wrap your arms around her and let her know everything will be all right. Mend the wings that used to soar and heal the heart that is shattered and torn. Restore beauty to her mind and strength to her soul.  Lift up this broken angel and make her once again whole.

Love the broken angels and lift them up in prayer.  They need it more than you know